TGIF | Working with Anxiety: Embracing Somatic Experiences and Parts Work
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Dear Community,
Last week, we discussed embracing uncomfortable feelings of anxiety and uncertainty, particularly in navigating the unknown. I've sensed a notable increase in unsettledness among us, likely attributed to the current state of the world and the impending elections. Our team is acutely aware of how election cycles impact the collective's mental health and resilience. This year is proving to be no exception.
In light of this, I want to address how we can effectively work with these feelings of anxiety. Notice how I said "work with"? We mustn't suppress, ignore, or evade our emotions. They carry essential messages that demand our attention. Today, let's dissect this in two ways: the somatic experience and understanding feelings through parts work.
Firstly, let's tackle the somatic aspect, which essentially means addressing the body. Despite advancements in the medical and mental health fields, there's still a considerable gap in acknowledging the wisdom and signals of the body. In somatic-based practices, we don't sideline the body but invite it in. Perhaps you've encountered this approach when a therapist asks, not "How does that make you feel?" but rather, "How does that feel in your body?" or "Where do you feel that in your body?". This redirects clients to tune into their somatic experiences rather than allowing their thoughts to dominate. Abundant research supports the idea that the body keeps the score and underscores the significance of body-based interventions. Drawing from this research informs our client approaches. I've been immersed in embodiment practices for years, starting with yoga and breathwork.
Yoga has served as the gateway to embodiment—an experience where my mind could quiet down, allowing my body's voice to emerge. I've shed tears in pigeon pose, releasing pent-up tension. Especially immediately post-COVID, stepping onto the mat in a serene, dimly lit room often led to profound emotional release. A forward fold becomes a conduit for releasing fears and disconnection.
Frustratingly, tuning into the body frequently necessitates slowing down. As a self-proclaimed "recovering" Type A personality, borderline neurodiverse, Enneagram 7, and Gemini, slowing down has become my life's mission. Yet, time and time again, I'm reminded of its necessity when I neglect to do so, resulting in illness, physical discomfort, intense emotions, and fatigue. Like all humans, I'm not immune to imperfection. My inner critic and perfectionist tendencies often propel me into a whirlwind of striving and control, pulling me away from my body. It's only when my body vehemently protests through various symptoms that I'm nudged back to a slower pace, prompting a much-needed check-in. "Oops, here we go again," I'll sheepishly acknowledge. And my body, ever forgiving, welcomes me back with open arms.
This brings me to the second aspect of anxiety—parts work. We've extensively discussed parts work over the years, and somatic parts work holds a special place in my heart. Every facet of our being craves acknowledgment and validation. Take, for instance, my eating disorder part. It yearns for recognition of its tireless efforts to keep me safe in a world where my body has often felt threatened. Years of external judgment, body shaming, and societal pressure have ingrained the belief that my body isn't a safe haven. This disconnect from my physical form has led to behaviors aimed at asserting control or, for many, mistreatment of their bodies.
Our parts spring into action when triggered by shame and insecurity, often at the expense of our bodies. Engaging in somatic experiences with our parts allows us to tap into the body's wisdom, fostering curiosity and compassion. When I experience intense neck pain on my right side, I can choose to ignore it or slow down and explore its origins. I can listen, inquire, and attend to its needs. Marcus Aurelius' words resonate deeply here: "What stands in the way becomes the way." We must navigate through discomfort rather than stuffing it into our physical form, a practice that only breeds further illness. Instead, we encourage meeting our bodily sensations, engaging with them, and listening intently.
This brings me back to our initial message—let's slow down. By embracing somatic experiences and delving into parts work, we cultivate a deeper connection with ourselves and, ultimately, foster resilience in the face of uncertainty.
For me, also approaching the next chapter of my womanhood, perimenopause, I feel the imperative to regain body trust. Knowing my body will embark on an unfamiliar and uncomfortable journey that I cannot control, learning to listen to my body will be essential to staying connected to wise, intuitive choices.
I hope you'll join me next month for our first Women's Circle, honoring this special stage of life.
As always, you’re never alone in this.
And this week’s TGIFs…
TOOL — Daily meditation prompts have been a wonderful way for me to slow down and tune in. I’ve been loving these by Richard Rohr lately.
GRATITUDE — Loving this book, Bodyfulness, as it gives so many practical tools for embodiment and somatic work.
INNOVATION — In eating disorder recovery, you often have to reconnect to repair. This new book is a landmark in establishing mindful, intuitive practices with food.
FEELS — Ditching the demands of HIIT and BootCamp after my body rebelled, I’m back to more mindful, slow movement with a twist. I love these exercises built specifically for women of a certain age from this book.